uhhuhhim (uhhuhhim1) wrote in semihorrible,

Diageo Unveils "Sandra Lee Cocktail Time Margaritas!"

If your recent St. Patrick's Day activities did not make your head spin, the following news will.

Earlier this week, Diageo—the world's largest distributor/manufacturer of spirits—announced the arrival of the Queen of SLop's latest farce, "Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas," her very own line of premade/ready-to-serve spirits.

Here is the official press release that went out earlier this week (Cringe-worthy statements have been bolded):

NORWALK, Conn., March 16, 2015 /PRNewswire/ — Diageo announces: “It’s Cocktail Time!” with Sandra Lee. This beloved phrase, recognized for over 15 years by millions of fans of multi-Emmy-winning celebrity chef and editor Sandra Lee, is now available in a bottle. America’s most relatable entertaining expert brings the party home to hosts everywhere with the long-awaited launch of Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas.

(Click to enlarge)
Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas in Key Lime and Strawberry are infused with real key limes and strawberries, pure cane sugar, premium blue agave silver tequila, triple sec liqueur and other natural flavors. This versatile ready-to-serve margarita is gluten-free and virtually guilt-free with fewer than 150 calories per 4 oz serving.

“My endless search for the perfect margarita has come to a happy end,” said Sandra Lee. “While the margarita is America’s number-one cocktail, it was nearly impossible to find a consistently great-tasting one. For the past year, I have made it my mission to create my own truly delicious margarita. After personally testing and tasting all of the ready-to-serve margaritas and premade cocktails on the market, along with signature recipes from restaurants and lounges, and my own kitchen creations, I’m proud to present my new, absolutely delicious, ready-to-serve Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas and Margarita Cocktails. They make any time of day… ‘the best time of the day.'”

Diageo, the world’s leading premium drinks business, and Sandra Lee, have a longstanding relationship dating back to 2004.

“After more than a decade of working together, we are thrilled to launch Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas,” said Ami-Lynn Bakshi, Vice President of Innovation, Diageo. “As a trusted expert in at-home hosting, Sandra has helped create delicious margaritas that will arrive just in time for Cinco de Mayo and summer entertaining.”

From April 15th through the 4th of July weekend, Sandra Lee will go on a national “Magazine and Margarita” tour to promote Sandra Lee Magazine and Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas and Margarita Cocktails. Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas, and accompanying recipes and entertaining ideas, will be prominently featured in a newly created flip-cover format in Sandra Lee’s national consumer magazine. At launch, Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas will also be promoted on the brand’s website, CocktailTime.com; through social activations on Pinterest, Instagram, YouTube, and Facebook; and via in-store promotions, point-of-sale materials, public relations efforts, and a cause-marketing campaign: Cocktail Time for a Cause.

Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas may be served straight from the bottle or used as the alcohol base in a variety of America’s other favorite cocktails—from Cosmos and Coladas to Martinis and Mojitos. Easy-to-follow creative drink recipes are found on the back label of each bottle to offer a variety of cocktails made perfect every time. At 26% proof (13% ABV), Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas will be available nationally for consumers of legal drinking age with a suggested retail price of $15.99 for a 750 ml bottle. One bottle of Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas serves six responsibly.

Whether celebrating the “best time of the day” with friends or hosting a Cocktail Time for a Cause event, hosts can please all guests with this ready-to-serve bar in a bottle—and its unlimited array of delicious serving suggestions and drink recipes. When planning a party, be sure to have plenty of food accompaniments, and offer a variety of non-alcoholic beverages and water so that all guests can relax responsibly.

Strawberry Cosmopolitan
Mint Crush Mojito
4 oz Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™
4 oz Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™
Strawberry Margarita
Key Lime Margarita
1 oz cranberry juice
Muddled mint
1 oz grapefruit soda
1 oz soda
Garnish with a grapefruit slice
Serve on the rocks with a mint sprig
Strawberry Pineapple Colada
Grapefruit Martini
4 oz Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™
4 oz Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™
Strawberry Margarita
Key Lime Margarita
2 strawberries
2 oz pink grapefruit soda
2 pieces pineapple
Garnish with a grapefruit slice
Blend with ice and garnish with a strawberry

Sandra Lee Cocktail Time™ Margaritas. Relax Responsibly.

Wow, this is the biggest "WTF?!" to come along in a while.  After all this time, she still proves that she's batshit crazy.  Exactly WHEN did, "It's Cocktail Time!," become a "beloved" phrase?  Surely, there aren't millions of Fandras, either.  Once again, she claims—or has someone else claim—that she's an expert.  This time, in "at-home hosting," whatever that is supposed to mean?  The biggest head-scratcher for me, apart from the nonsensical cocktail recipes, is her spin on the "Drink responsibly" catchphrase.  "Relax responsibly?!"  Ok, as opposed to what, relaxing anxiously?...LMAO!  This woman is a fucking JOKE!  Plus, I'm pretty sure—for about $5-$10 more—you can get double the amount of hard liquor vs. her watered-down bullshit, which is surely a waste of money.  This is one product I will NEVER buy!
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